Is it appropriate for daycare providers to kiss the children?
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tayy2004 asked:
What do you all think about this? My son is 5 months and has been in day care for about six weeks. It is a facility that cares for infants and toddlers. Well, the person who takes care of my son primarily, kisses him on the cheeks and very near the mouth a lot. I know this because she’ll give him at least two in front of me on most days. I even noticed her very close to his face and nearly kissing him when she had a bad cold a few weeks ago. Two days later, he had a bad cold. I think that day care providers who are not family should not be kissing on kids, period. I want to say something to the woman but don’t know how to do so without hurting her feelings. It’s clear to me that she loves babies and caregivers of children should be loving; however, I feel that constant kisses is inappropriate and am disturbed every time I see it happening.
What do you all think about this? My son is 5 months and has been in day care for about six weeks. It is a facility that cares for infants and toddlers. Well, the person who takes care of my son primarily, kisses him on the cheeks and very near the mouth a lot. I know this because she’ll give him at least two in front of me on most days. I even noticed her very close to his face and nearly kissing him when she had a bad cold a few weeks ago. Two days later, he had a bad cold. I think that day care providers who are not family should not be kissing on kids, period. I want to say something to the woman but don’t know how to do so without hurting her feelings. It’s clear to me that she loves babies and caregivers of children should be loving; however, I feel that constant kisses is inappropriate and am disturbed every time I see it happening.
February 7th, 2009 at 7:12 pm
well if u feel un-comfortable…. then 1.tell not to do that anymore(hard to do) or 2. find a new daycare….
if i was a daycare person…i wudn’t kiss the children….no offense…
February 9th, 2009 at 2:10 am
this is your child. daycare people are not supposed to be kissing the children. it is a violation and can be considered sexual assult because it isnt there place.
let her know firmly that it is not alright and you will report her to authorities if she continues to molest your child, because that is what it is. if you don’t address the situation, she will continue to do it and might even go further. i would stop it as soon as possible.
February 11th, 2009 at 11:58 pm
OK.. to start off. I worked at a daycare before.. she should not be kissing the baby with a bad cold! What is she thinking?? I wouldve defiantly told her whats up especially since your baby got sick.. Nothing is wrong with kisses but constant ones..? i dont know maybe you’re overreacting.. not to sound mean.. but some of the moms that i worked with overreacted about little things..She is giving him love and attention so be happy for that. At least he is not getting ignored and sitting in a stroller all day.
Tell the lady how you feel though.. its up to you in the end. I wish u luck!
February 12th, 2009 at 9:06 am
It great to love babies but you need to tell her that kissing him like that is a no no because he can get sick so easy. If she feels she has to kiss she can kiss him hello and goodbye on his fingers.
Penny Babson
February 14th, 2009 at 11:31 pm
if you have a goos repor with this woman, then you should have no problem telling her how you feel. she should understand. she should have to respect your wishes as you are her “customer”.. so to speak.. if she does not then you should take it it her supervisor.. i knwo i have smooched the babies in my care a few times.. but really only the head or cheek.. but not if i was sick and most definatly not close to the mouth.. if a mother or father would come with a concern of this type, i would be totally fine with doing what they want me to. just tell her.
February 17th, 2009 at 10:54 pm
*gasp* God forbid a woman should show affection to the children in her care!!!!
I used to be the infant care manager in a child development center. That means I was in charge of the staff that looked after the infants. Those infants were in our care for 8-12 hours a day. I’m sorry but it is very difficult not to bond with children you care for that many hours, five days a week. We were there for all their mile stones. Where were the parents? It is very difficult to provide nurturing for a child and not want to cuddle and kiss that child. What are we…robots? You should be grateful you have a caring provider who obviously likes her job and enjoys the children. Instead of bitching about it maybe you should thank her for taking such good care of your precious child.
It is bad enough that parents dump their kids in daycare and let someone else raise them. But now you’re complaining because the person you’ve hired to do that is TOO loving? Give me a friggin break! Maybe you should find one of those places where they leave the kids in cribs all day and rarely answer their cries and when they do hold them they don’t talk to them or love them at all. Sound like that would suit your needs better.
February 18th, 2009 at 1:16 pm
As the parent, who do you expect to speak up if you don’t?
February 20th, 2009 at 9:30 am
i dont think she means it in an inappropriate way, babies r cute and kissable. but if it really bothers you, say something. honestly though i dont think you should worry about it
February 23rd, 2009 at 4:33 pm
well if you feel bad telling her maybe you could go to someone else in the facility and tell them so they can talk to her about it. my friend is studying childcare at the moment and she tells me that the daycare or childcare providers are not aloud to kiss the kids, they can teach them affection by being nice and giving them a cuddle when they arrive and leave but thats it as far as i know. u shoud say something if this is causing you stress.
February 25th, 2009 at 3:11 am
I would be grateful of the affection being shown on my child. Would you rather they prop your son in a corner and never touch him? Your child is in a daycare with other children. He’s going to get sick – alot. Be prepared to miss alot of work due to this for the next few years.
February 27th, 2009 at 2:52 pm
Tell the director. It is your child!!!! Duh! When it comes to your child you should not worry about hurting anyones feelings. And your son probably got his cold from that dumbass.
February 27th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
She just sounds affectionate.
However, if you are uncomfortable with it (I would be too) then ask her to stop or seek out new care. Your options are limited…as they are for all of us moms!
Look at it this way…at least she’s being affectionate. Some care providers harm children. I’d rather deal with affection. But, that’s just me.
March 2nd, 2009 at 11:11 pm
First of all children get germs, they all do even the young ones. Especially when they are around other children. Colds are a virus and they usually don’t show symptoms until 5-10 days after exposure so her kissing him 2 days before he got a cold was probably not the culprit.
Second you should be thankful that you have found such a great daycare center where the provider loves you child and attends to his needs. One of the biggest needs of an infant is affection that is how they learn to love and be loved. IF you are putting your child in daycare for 8 hrs a day how do you expect to show him all the affection he needs? I don’t think it is bad that he is in daycare I do think that you should be a little less paranoid and a little more thankful for what they are doing for your son.
March 4th, 2009 at 4:27 am
every child needs one primary caregiver. without that, the child gets screwed up emotionally and can’t bond. wow, your son has a primary care giver who loves him. this hurts you because you are supposed to be the one loving him and you’ve copped out.
if you are not going to bother to raise your kids, for god’s sake, leave the child with someone decent enough to smother them with kisses. how dare you decide not to raise him and then decide he shouldn’t get love from anyone. you are a very sick puppy. your poor baby.
do you have any idea how bad day care is for kids? hurts their iq, their bonding, their father’s approval of them, their social skills, and increases depression and anxiety. this you’ll do to your kid, but heaven forbid someone kiss him and expose him to love, warmth, humane feelings – i mean, germs.